Understanding Others

We can understand others when we learn to understand our own self. This is because we see a reflection of our own self in others. If we are the suspicious sort, we will see others' actions with suspicion, imputing motives where probably none exist. An innocent child trusts since he or she is guileless. If we understand and accept our own selves we can accept others as they are. We must see ourselves as a whole, warts and all. We must be open and frank with our own self.

Conscience

Our conscience is the the best keeper in this wide world. But sometime in our pursuit of self interest we overlook the tiny inner voice of our conscience, not realising that we are sowing seeds of confusion and doubt. This is the reason for restlessness. To identify the voice of the conscience one needs occasional solitude. In silent contemplation we get a clear picture of our own self. We learn to understand ourselves and the vapours of confusion are likely to vanish.
Unless we understand our own self, it is difficult to understand others.

Living life to the full

We really do not know what living life to the full is. Very often we focus on what we have been unable to do rather than on our little accomplishments which really are the spring board for larger tasks. Each small task performed satisfactorily is a brick for the castle of our entire life. In retrospect each and every moment of exhilaration and disappointment propels us towards the goals of our life. If we cease to compare with others, all of us live life to the full, to our full capacity.
It is a different matter that each one's capacity varies.

Being alone when we want to be with friends can be depressing. But if we stay connected through nature, the experience can be elevating. A squirrel came to my room through the open door, sniffed around, did a small jig and then scuttled off leaving me in smiles. We feed the birds in the balcony and if someone is a little late with the bread we can see them waiting patiently on the railing. The crows will not let us forget their dues if we are busy, they'll caw constantly! Perforce some one in the family has to attend to their needs. I draw the line at pigeons flitting in and out of the house though they have tried their best to use the balconies as nesting grounds. Having been refused permission, they anyway use it as their sitting room!
I am also fascinated with the plant of chinese oranges and keep a tab on its progress from the sweet smelling flowers to the fruit which takes time to ripen from dark green to light green and then to deep orange. Plants become a source of joy if we relate to them.
We have to look around and seek to make connections with the ever present sentient nature.

Memory Lane

A walk down memory lane is refreshing if we turn to the happy moments of our life, and all of us have our fair share of them. We only have to think back and remember. The essence of daffodils captured by Wordsworth in his poem fills me with elation though i yet have to see a field of the flowers.
As for the unpleasant moments, one should learn what needs to be learnt and then move on. Bitter feelings should be overcome and forgotten.

Perseverance

Perseverance is the quality which helps us overcome hurdles and eggs us towards scuccess. But do we turn towards it when we need it most or do we succumb to our inner fears and insecurities? The search for outside help ends when we log in to our own inner self for succour. Getting strength from within steadies us and makes us perservere in achieving our goals. Sitting quietly in silence is the sure means of connecting within and understanding your strengths and how best to utilise them.

Attraction in a marriage

Attraction between two persons is thought to be a sufficient reason to live together. The attraction that does not wear off leads to a fulfilling relationship. All of us are constantly growing and evolving but if one person remains unchanged while the other changes problems begin to brew. If the attraction is genuine and unselfish both will accept each other and be happy in their togetherness.
When we imagine and suspect change we begin to be confused. This confusion is compounded by lack of proper communication. We should accept that partners will evolve and change. What is needed is being happy in each other's company. To do so both have to make a constant effort to have good thoughts about each other and lovingly voice their doubts.
It is necessary to think well of each other for a relationship to blossom.

Marriage

Marriage contains the word mirage and perhaps people look at it as one, a beautiful union on a bed of roses. A togetherness which is based on friendship and caring will survive the natural calamities of life's ups and downs. In friendship we willingly give space to each other to pursue interests other than our own. True friends rarely cling and are always around to help out. Marriage should be thought of as a continuous friendship with each partner blossoming in their own way and helping the other too.
A friendship that lasts is based on proper communication.

Being alive

Being alive is a joyful state in itself. Even a mundane existence will be full of life if we tune ourselves to nature. Nature is always in a state of activity whether seen or unseen. It is fascinating to observe a tiny shoot appear and to watch it grow and flower. We are all part of nature, growing, blossoming, flowering and finally withering. Life is a state of continuous activity, whether we like it or not. We should be alive to everything happening around us, small acts of sharing, kindness and love.

Being happy with yourself

As a child I remember my father intoning to my mother 'Icannot give you an injection of happiness. Your happiness lies within your own self.' I did not understand much but the words were imprinted in my mind and now I realise how true they are. The moment we look towards others to make us happy, we are sowing the seed of dissatisfaction and disappointment. Caught as everyone is in their own whirlpool of activity we should be happy with each one's contribution in terms of time and effort, be it at home or at work. Home is a place to relax, to live and let live, to accept and not to expect.
The restlessness within us is the source of dissatisfaction and unhappiness. The root cause should be understood by careful and sincere analysis. The light of understanding showers peace and only then can you be happy with yourself.

The little joys of life

Sometimes so engrossed are we in our daily routine of juggling tasks and time that little joys pass us by, unnoticed and unappreciated. An unexpected warm smile can really light up our day, looking at the bright blue sky will cheer us up and a hot cup of tea or coffee on a wintry afternoon will uplift us no end, if only we pause and notice them. There are many more, we just have to look out for them. Being happy is in our hands.

Resolutions

Do we really need to make New Year resolutions? Do we stick to them for a while and then slide back to our daily routine and forget all about them ? I personally am not in favour of treating one day as special only for a short time. Each day, each moment is special if we make it so. It is in our hands to make a tiny resolution for each day. Let's say, today the whole day I'll not frown and then see whether we can keep it up. It's a challenge for us. If we cannot, we should accept our imperfection gracefully and not get upset about it. That's another challenge!!
We can all share our experiences and learn from each other.